Laurie Kilmartin is an American comedian and writer best known for being a finalist on Last Comic Standing season 7. She is currently a staff writer for the Conan O'Brien show Conan.
She grew up in Northern California and went to UCLA where she was a competitive swimmer.
Kilmartin performed stand-up on ABC's Jimmy Kimmel Live!, Comedy Central's Premium Blend, Showtime, the USO Tour Cuba, performing for troops in Iraq, Shorties Watchin' Shorties, Verdict with Dan Abrams, Red Eye w/ Greg Gutfeld, and The World Stands Up. She has been featured at comedy festivals in Aspen, Edinburgh, and Montreal.
Laurie Kilmartin also appeared on VH1 Best Week Ever, the Today Show, White Boyz in Da Hood, Countdown with Keith Olbermann, The Rachel Maddow Show, Fox & Friends and The Oprah Winfrey Show.
Kilmartin was also a 'Top Ten' finalist in season 7 of NBC's "Last Comic Standing." She was also listed in The Huffington Post 53 Favorite Female Comedians list in 2011.
In 2009 Kilmartin released a CD, Five Minutes to Myself, consisting of material that she was not allowed to use on air. The CD covers topics such as immigrant boyfriends and unwanted Mexican babies, then answers an age-old question, why is God such a Prick in the Old Testament? Punchline Magazine called Five Minutes to Myself one of the "Top Ten Comedy CDs of 2009."
As a writer, Kilmartin was on the staff of the Late Late Show, Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn (on which she was also a frequent panelist), and Comedy Central's Too Late with Adam Carolla and The Bonnie Hunt Show. She also wrote articles published on Huffington Post, Babble.com, and co-authored Sherri Shepherd's memoir, "Permission Slips." Currently she is the only female staff writer for Conan.
Kilmartin performed in the June 2012 edition of Don't Tell My Mother! (Live Storytelling), a monthly showcase in which authors, screenwriters, actors and comedians share true stories they would never want their mothers to know.
Kilmartin is a single mother who often jokes about her son and motherhood.
Laurie Kilmartin at the Internet Movie Database